The Shame Of ‘Honour Killing’ Of Our Children
By Marianne de Nazareth
01 August, 2010
Countercurrents.org
Honour killing? Isn’t it a shame that we in 21st century India glorify brazen murder, perpetrated by ignorant family members on their helpless young family members, by calling it ‘honour killing’? The word honour as defined in the dictionary is ‘glory or recognition, a source or cause of credit’. Does chopping off a young man’s hands and feet in western UP, burning a young girl alive in Ghaziabad, or electrocuting a couple in North East Delhi by their relatives, for going against so called societal norms, constitute honourable intent? Does it bring credit to the family that shamefully denied a couple the right to love and living? In my opinion, so called ‘honour killing’ is a total misnomer and deaths which seem to be increasing alarmingly and being touted as ‘honour killing,’ are pure and simple acts of murder. Brutal and calculated murder since it usually is a parent or sibling who is involved in committing the heinous act.
Views are being expressed that Khap panchayats which hold sway over rural North Eastern India have been the source of this escalation of so called honour killing. In the past, several villages which were united by caste and geography came under one khap. This was mainly done by the wealthy and upper caste Jats who wished to consolidate their power and position way back in 14th century India. Prevalent in Haryana, western UP and parts of Rajasthan, those who lived in one khap were not allowed to marry or intermarry with any other gotra in the same village. These 10-15 men were in charge of the panchayat, settled disputes and controlled the lives of the young in the village. Writs were enforced by the panchayat which were often upheld by the villagers and included social boycotts, fines, forced suicides or like in these cases forced ‘honour’ killing by parents. Strangely these Khap Panchayats are rearing their heads in the 21st century with the government not doing too much to curb the menace, which threatens to escalate beyond any sort of logic behind it.
At a recent meeting of State Women’s Commissions in July 2010 in New Delhi no member from UP, MP and Rajasthan attended the meeting. A representative from Haryana, supported the Khap Panchayat alleging that these panchayats formerly did good work, and now were not being ‘appreciated’ any more. When rebuked by the chairperson, the representative said that today’s youth need to show more ‘responsibility’ to society.
In two recent OpEds, Pinky Anand in the Hindu opposed the swelling demand for the amendment of the Hindu Marriage Act of 1955 where certain communities can prohibit marriage within the same gothra. Anand opposes the move basing her argument on the act which prohibited marriages between ‘sapindas’. Put simply a sapinda is a lineal ascendant of the other in the sapinda relationship or if they had a common lineal ascendant, this was prohibited. Anand said the law did not prohibit inter-caste marriages or what is being enforced today- the prohibition of same gothra marriages. To quote her: “Are we talking about a modern India where we have been fighting to abolish age-old caste practices? Are we talking of a dynamic and integrated India where there is a high level of mobility, inter-mingling, and inter-mixing of religions and castes?” she asks.
Madhu Kishwar advocates the freedom of choice that belongs to communities when deciding religious matters such as marriages, and rebuts objections based on “modernity” such as Anand’s. From ‘A Question of Balance’ (Times of India): “After declaring a marriage between uncle and niece invalid in law, the HMA legitimises the customary practice of marriages among many south Indian communities, between first cousins and between maternal uncle and niece. Such a marriage among many north Indian communities would be considered as good as incest.
Most of us would feel horrified at a brother and sister from the same parents getting married to each other. But we tend to forget that for those who believe in the sanctity of gotra identity, marriage within the same gotra is as good as incest. In their moral universe, people of the same gotra are like brother and sister. Why judge India’s communities by the social and moral norms currently prevalent in the western nuclear family?,” she asks.
Reading both Op-Eds, both points of view hold a lot of water in this debate, if you want to debate without looking to solve the issue. My premise from the start has been, how can young lives be snuffed out by the very parents who gave birth to them due to some draconian law upheld by a panchayat? Is there any question of debate when it comes to life and living of your own flesh and blood? Why do we ad nauseam throw up so called ‘dodgy’ and questionable ‘western values’ when the whole point of the argument is to expose ‘honour killing’ to what it really is – murder of innocents?
There is no custom or tradition or value or law that should allow these deaths to continue. We live in the 21st century and India is considered to be a developing nation not a third world country any more. Let us not regress into the dark ages where we let ridiculous norms dictate what is right and wrong to us. How can we allow these shameful acts of murder be committed in the name of tradition. There is no tradition worth keeping if it causes us to kill our own defenceless child.
We, the so called educated in India should launch and support campaigns where the right to the choice of an individual’s spouse should be made mandatory. There should be laws enacted which should bring out stringent laws to bring to book murders being committed citing panchayat rulings. There is no question of debate. Our children are in danger if we allow perpetration of these killings in the name of honour by a medieval institution, harking back to the 14th century. Let us remove the blinkers from our eyes and only then, can we see the shame of what is being conducted, in the name of honour and family prestige in our country.
(The writer is the former Assistant Editor, and adjunct faculty St. Joseph’s College, Bangalore)
Fellow with UNFCCC, UNEP & Robert Bosch Stiftung
Former Asst Editor- The Deccan Herald
Freelance Journalist
Adjunct faculty St. Joseph's College & COMMITS
http://mariannedenazareth.blogspot.com/
